Chinese Paper Ribs Charlie Sheen

If you're looking for an unexpected read this morning: The Global Times, a nationalistic Chinese paper known for its cheek, has published a takedown of embattled star Charlie Sheen, which include a list of suggestions as to how he could have better concealed his actions. He boasts of two girlfriends, but “Is he too poor to set up his wives and mistresses in different houses?” Instead of frequenting brothels and using drugs, Sheen should have visited a Karaoke parlor. “As much as Sheen has lived a life most Chinese men can only fantasize about, our admiration of him can only go so far,” the article admits. “Racism, spousal abuse, addiction, politics, mental illness, boasting about mistresses–these are all subjects best dealt with behind closed doors.”