We first met Charles Ramsey, the hero who rescued three Cleveland women from close to a decade of captivity, in this amazing interview. His plain white T-shirt counterbalanced his colorful personality, and Ramsey’s intensity and wit shone through as he described his decisive actions. But first, he mentioned his meal at McDonald’s. Delicious.
The interview made him an Internet celebrity. Before long, “Charles Ramsey” was trending on Twitter, YouTubers were paying him Auto-Tuned homage, and Antoine Dodson was welcoming him into the pantheon of hilariously expressive local TV interview subjects.
(Here’s the requisite Gregory Brothers auto-tune:)
Then, breaking news! In an interview with Cleveland’s Plain Dealer, Ramsey revealed that he had been eating a Big Mac when he heard Amanda Berry’s screams—and that he brought the Big Mac with him as he went to rescue her.
If that tidbit didn’t prove to you the value of local news, perhaps this will. WKYC scored the first follow-up interview with the man-legend, wherein the Big Mac mahatma confirmed what the nation had suspected: “I’m the definition of a man, bro!” he said.
Let’s recap. Amanda Berry was kidnapped in 2003 after leaving her shift at Burger King. Charles Ramsey rescued her close to 10 years later, after returning from McDonald’s. And to close the fast-food loop, the suspected kidnapper—Ramsey’s neighbor—was apprehended ... at McDonald’s. Chew on that.
And finally: here’s the icing on the cake. Or the special sauce on the Big Mac, you choose. Ramsey’s 911 call is a profanity-laden masterpiece. He opens with “Yeah—hey bro,” which we can imagine is not what the operator on the other end of the line was expecting. He continues, after offering up his location: “I just came from McDonald’s, right”—solidifying the theme we’ve grown to love throughout his work. And then, after identifying the woman he rescued—“she said her name was Linda Berry or some shit; I don’t know who the fuck that is”—Ramsey exasperatedly says he has no idea if the accused perpetrator is still in the house. “I don’t have a fucking clue, bro,” he offers. “I’m just standing here with McDonald’s.”
You did a lot more than just stand there with McDonald’s, Mr. Ramsey. You’re an American hero.